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Am I On Mute, Or What?
All I have is filled notebooks.
Scribbled out pages.
Written poems,
And unspoken rages.
I could write it all.
It would come out true.
I could let the pencil fly.
But, somehow, my voice refuses to speak to you.
I fake a smile.
I'll write the story out at eve.
When you ask me to tell the truth,
I lie, say I am.
And then quickly leave.
My anger bursts in manuscript.
My tears streak the paper.
I wonder why,
When I'm writing I feel so much safer.
I had it all planned out.
I knew what to say.
But when it came the time?
Well, let's just say?
Tell you? I'm afraid I never may.
So, for now, I'll let the lead skim across the page.
I'll continue to show the real me in my notepad.
I won't let you ever know,
What it knows.
That I'm really truly sad.
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