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Muscle Memory
It’s not that I need you,
It’s just that it has become
Muscle memory
To call you,
To dial your number
And ask how your day was
To assure that we are okay
It’s just that every time
I reach home,
I find my fingers crawling up
And around my phone
Speaker on,
Having a snack,
Watching the news on mute,
Making a list of things to do,
Reading through a homework assignment
And talking to you
It’s just that you’ve gotten me so used to
Filling grains of silence with noise
Getting my daily dose of your philosophies
And just having a companion
While I pour myself milk
It’s just that I have become so accustomed to
Trying to fix every little thing with you
To make amends,
To start anew,
To constantly and so quickly forgive you
And I can’t seem to stand
A minute of friction in our voices
Because I wasn’t like this before
But after constant calls and long hours on the phone
I’ve developed a sense of dependency,
But its not dependency, it’s just muscle memory
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