how is it my fault i feel the way i do

my parents think it is, and sometimes i do too

my friends have no clue what i'm going through

is this the battle i need to fight alone

the sadness i feel is forigen, happiness is all i've ever known

sometimes i feel like i'm split in two, myself and a clone

this close has inhibited my body, shifting my mood

i ignore the hunger in my stomach, no longer wanting food

i feel so insecure staring at my body nude

i just want to rid myself of this endless spiral my life has become

i haven't eaten and enjoyed it not even a crumb

it's hard to feel anything when you've fallen into a slum

the constant disappointment that i feel, and that i am

barley finishing work, stuck, in what feels like a traffic jam

so full but so empty like an email full of spam

how is it that no one hears my scream

but as they say things are not as they seem

the one sided help seems to be a constant theme

its weird that not long before i was happy, a dreamt

this cycle i've experienced has ruined my self-esteem

and now the question is when will i feel better

it certainly won't be soon, but i hope this int forever

i'll have to cover my ugly self-inflicted scars with a sweater

but to feel like light again,

and these are my reasons for this letter.