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Not Like Them
I am not like them, with their thousand friends
and their smooth, effortless words.
I am not like them, with their skin-tight jeans
and their stylish backpacks,
the brand that everyone but me knew was fashionable.
I am not like them, with their trailing tangles
of earbuds and their fingers darting and dipping
over their phone screens like frantic swallows at dusk,
texting, texting, texting everyone they know.
I am not like them.
I will never be like them.
I am not like them,
and I don't ever want to be like them.
Except sometimes, I do.
I want to be the kind of girl that doesn't sit alone
in the library at lunch.
I want to be the kind of girl who doesn't cry
in the bathroom during gym.
I want to be the kind of girl that has more than one friend.
But I don't know how. Is that wrong? Am I wrong?
I don't know. I don’t know.
I
don't
know
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This poem is for everyone who has ever been lonely, everyone who has ever felt that they do not belong and never will.