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My plea to a higher power
Its unreal
What am I even doing here?
Writing poems all over the place
Phone, computer, notebook, diaries, mind, soul, on you, on them, on your fingers, on your eyes, lips, skin
What I am I doing here?
I want to be at home
I want to feel that I was always there- the feeling of leaving
My mom said she hated me
And that she wanted Ian to never be like me
But
I hate her too
It doesn’t stop me from being upset
Cause she puts on this happy, I love you face
And then does some sh*t like say she hates me instead of saying it to my face
My family is in Minnesota
It was never here
It was
It was never going to be you
Or the people whose blood I shared
It was gonna be people
I met along this lonely road
It feels so weird to be alive
Here
Away
Far
I’m in the wrong chapter
I think it all got messed up and out of order
I’m not supposed to be here yet, Satan
I think you got your list messed up.
See? There’s my name. I’m not supposed to be here right now. This is for the future.
Put me back.
Please.
You know I hate it here.
Yeah, I know who you are. And you know who I am.
Just make it right, please
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I have had a spiritual war with entities and gods. After years of separating myself from Christianity, any suffering plea I had to God never worked. He never listened. I figured, if he wouldn't, maybe Satan would