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Lonesome Darkness
May 1, 2023
laying there, staring at the ceiling
staring blankly
hearing the muffled hum of conversation
but having made it that day
she doesn’t want to make it tomorrow
looking at one of the highest suicide rates
wondering
will one person really make a world of difference?
to not feel this way you have to get private care
she can’t afford
ambiguity persists over the possibility that it is just a wave
a wave of not wanting to be here
or maybe it was not just a wave
maybe her life was supposed to end at the hands of her own
working hard to improve mental health and tackle addiction
mentally drained
dissociating from who and what you are supposed to be
she is fighting to survive
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With lines from “Guyana’s Mental Health Care Shortage” by Madeline Bishop, a Pulitzer Center reporting project