I’m sitting in my bed when my head starts to think

Heavy thoughts start to trickle in my brain

The little trickle starts to pour

The droplets that fill my head start to swarm 

They sting and sting making bright red clouds

The rushing river shows no mercy

Rocks are falling hard on my chest 

With every breath I take the harder and harder it gets

If I ever try to get up I slip on the ice 

I slip and fall hard and I can't do anything about it 

Making me feel lost in the woods with the trees blocking every path of escape

Making me feel like i've been lured into a cavern that has no way out

Making me feel like i'm being forced to climb an unclimbable mountain

My tears form puddles and seem so small but over time they grow

They grow into raging rivers 

They grow into soaring seas

They grow into monstrous oceans that just won't leave me be

Making me push everyone away 

Having me start over 

Because I blame me and am naive to the pattern

The pattern i've seen since I was 6 

That no ones ever stayed

I always think ill find someone 

I always wait for someone to pull me out of my storm

And that person always creates a new one 

Making me get lost in the woods

Making me realize i'm stuck in a cavern

Making me fall off the top of a mountain

And making me drown in the ocean of my tears