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February 20, 2010
By LivyFay BRONZE, Groton, Massachusetts
More by this author
LivyFay BRONZE, Groton, Massachusetts
4 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. -DR. Seuss

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i saw myself for the first time today
eyes rimmed with ashy redness,
shimmered tears glisten against my cheeks,
hair spilling out of my ponytail.

i saw the girl i knew so well
who i loved-
she was falling apart,
little
by
little.

i saw myself
and i cried harder.

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2 comments.

LivyFay BRONZE said...
on Apr. 16 2010 at 11:00 pm
LivyFay BRONZE, Groton, Massachusetts
4 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don&#039;t matter and those who matter don&#039;t mind. -DR. Seuss

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Thanks for your comment-I can understand why you would get annoyed at grammer. But I just wrote this "spur of the moment" when I was upset once-I didn't want to change it because I was trying to capture my mood at the time. (sad, couldn't think straight) I'll be sure to check out your works and thanks for the comment.
thewriteidea DIAMOND said...
on Apr. 16 2010 at 10:35 pm
thewriteidea DIAMOND, Pleasanton, California
67 articles 0 photos 336 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Don&#039;t cry that it&#039;s over, smile because it has happened.&quot;

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this is really good. I like your poems a lot. Just one thing I would suggest: 1- you have some grammar errors, for example "who" instead of "whom." Normally it wouldn't really matter, but since it sort of distracted me I thought I should point it out. Other than that it was a fantastic piece. Nice!