I feel like everything I worked for has just been bluntly ridiculed and pushed out the window, like it was just for a perfunctory purpose! An amazing but intriguing pain stabs me. If only the pain was physical, I would have fought through it; gulped a few dozen painkillers but no; the pain I have is a mysterious one indeed. It hurts me and hunts me every passing second from somewhere deep within, nothing exterior; not at all.

Why me? Why should I be the target every time? Why was I the one made a failure in my own eyes? My eyes once filled with optimism and hope have become hopelessly blank searching and groping my way through the iridescent darkness. All of my dreams have been pulverized, crushed to tiny pieces; tiny enough that I cant gather enough courage and determination to assemble those pieces together and wish for the bright future. I am undoubtedly, most evidently perturbed but what can I do? I can do nothing but fake a smile through my lips and wait, perhaps for a new beginning or to the end of my despair.
As time moves on, maybe, just maybe I can label this whole situation as something less significant and innocuous. I hope I can find something more obsolete a success than the failure that I have received now.
My heart and soul begs me to not let time and fate stop me from what I want to be. It obliges me to no more wish to be a craven and pray for the result of my hard work. It encourages me to work for the present, for the very passing minute. Despite this desires of my soul, I find that I have reached a situation of impasse and oblivion. I want to move ahead leaving my failures behind but I don't seem to be able to do so. Is like I have been placed behind bars, clutched and tied together by hawsers and chains that have been mercilessly created out of my own optimism.
So, I cry, desperately begging and pleading for the pain inside me to be physical. God! let this pain be physical! Grant me mercy, relieve me from this unknown suffering!