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Routine
6am wake-up call ignored.
She was already awake,
Drowning in melodies of silence
Til high pitched beeps synced
With flashing lights come to
Warn her its now
or never.
28 minutes and 36 seconds to shower.
She
Stands under shining silver shower head
Beckoning refuge.
Cold relief dripping prayers
On flow
Wash yesterday's sins away.
Big brand name cleanser blankets
Tear stains they can never truly wash away
With artificial scents of
What she imagines
Citrus to feel like.
Rubs brush across wire formed
Teeth and gums
Til the scum of feigned happiness
Breaks.
Spits the lies down the drain
Then replaces the bitterness of yesterday
With mint flavoured redemption.
20 minutes and 2 seconds to get dressed.
She
Lathers lotion between soft palms.
Spreads warm wetness on waiting arms and legs
Like liquid chocolate.
They don't need to see your skin break
Layer on deodorant antiperspirant
Cause they don't need to smell your anxiety.
Pulls lacy black underwear over
Bulging bum and breasts.
And Remembers how they voted hers the best.
And just in case the walk home
Peels your shell away,
He'll have something to look at.
Remember me as the best you conquered.
Wraps black mini skirt around hips
Then Slides black boots past ankles up to knees.
Hiking the strips shorter
Proud she fought the urge to carve her sorrows into
Smooth brown thighs
And instead slit her soul deep,
The pain worse
But at least they wont see.
At least
They'll still call me Sexy.
Drapes loose pink sweater over
Small frame
Cut the neckline deeper
So they wont pay attention to the
purple bruises underneath
Peaking through.
Combs curled black locks back
Pulls the bun tight.
Sprays chemical threats for gloss and discipline.
Nothing must fall out of place.
Then
She'll paint her face
15 minutes to create a new mask.
She
Smears the base on for moisture
So it'll be easy later
When her skin screams to breath.
Plasters on the foundation
Because hers is too cracked to
Display.
They don't need to see she's still human.
Paints plump lips with hues of Poison Peach and Crimson.
Make the lies more attractive as they leave.
Layers concealer over pimple stained
Nose and under eyes.
They don't need to know
you know Insomnia.
Dabs bronze and silver powder over eyelids.
Line the rims in death black paint and smudge.
Pulls black and subtle blues through lashes,
Calling them longer to fool the wind.
then,
Covers brown eyes with blue
To simulate what her skies are missing.
And for the finally,
Spray scented water with the promise of french springs
Over the well constructed facade you've created.
Ready to make the world happy.
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