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There For You
I watch and observe you
I want you – but you need me
I smell that perfume
And grow nauseous with weakness
Because I know I could never make you that happy
I hate seeing you like this
But you won't listen to me
When I only want to help you save yourself
Because you are your only hope
And this is your last chance
You and I both know it
Please don't ignore it
I know it's hard
But please try
These tears I shed are for you
Because no matter what you think
You're not alone – I'd never leave you
I love you, no matter what sick twisted
Demented reality you believe
Trust me instead
Because these voices in your head
I know they're deafening
But they're lying
Their comfort is false, their whispers untrue
But I'm right here by your side
Trying oh so desperately to ease your pain
If only you would let me inside instead
I would give you anything, everything
All you need to do is ask
Take me, I'm yours
Don't let this consumption consume you
Don't like this demon exorcize you
Don't let this shape shifter mold you
Speak up, speak out, speak to me
I want to hear you, I need to feel you
Confide in me, be honest with me
As I have been with you
Please don't push me away
I do need you like you need me
I love you, so please don't hate yourself
How I wish I was enough
To stop you
To end this vicious cycle
To heal you
To help you
For you
And as the heart monitor is clicked off
Time of death is taken
And I weep, knowing you're gone,
Understanding how much I'll miss you
Realizing how much you meant to me
Because you were special – and there is no one else like you
No matter what bulls*** you told yourself
And I look to a future without you
Outside the hospital room window
To grey, storm clouded and troubled skies
Unable to comprehend how much hurt is in store
For me - and all the rest you left behind
Wishing you had loved me
More than you hated yourself
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