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Alone In A Crowded Room (I'm Fine)
"Breathe. Just breathe. This will all be over with eventually. Keep your cool. Don't cry."She silently kept repeating to herself as she sits alone at the crowed lunch table. She bounces her legs unable to stop and she wrapped her arms around her waist and pictures that someone is there to hold her. But of course there isn't. The loud noises only muffle her soft sobs as she holds her breath. As if she is unable to breath.
Again she is without a lunch. Starving herself to make herself presentable in public. But she is never able to go with out food for more than an afternoon before she breaks down again. Food is her one comfort.
She is without friends or any real parents. Her mother left under a year ago to live with her boyfriend. Her father is too depressed to ever care about her issues.
Her mother's boyfriend, Ralph, is not the type of person that you would want to be around. In a high school analogy he would be that one freak that somehow got all the girls. Unattractive yet seductive. Ralph had married several times. Divorced every one of them once he got what he wanted. His most resent ex-wife had three children. The oldest one, was this girl's best friend.
The oldest girl's name was Amanda. Although she never called her that. But instead, Panda. Panda was bi-polar. Often she was angry and did not want to be talked to under any circumstance. But she would occasionally talk to one person. The girl.
Today it seemed to the girl that even Panda was ignoring her. She had been sitting alone all this time and Panda hadn't said a word to her despite that fact that she was less than two yards away.
Everyone had left the lunch table by now. Except the girl. She's still there bouncing her legs begging herself not to cry.
"Hey Livy! Come sit with me!" Panda says loud enough so that most of the lunch room can hear. Livy did not want to have even more attention drawn to her so without a fight she gets up and walks to Panda's table.
"What's wrong Liv?!" Panda asks with a sudden look of concern on her face. "I'm fine." Livy whispers trying to keep the tears in.
"No you're not! Now tell me, what's wrong?" Panda says as if she is going to pound the words out of her. Panda is a strong girl that always fights to get what she wants. Most of the school is scared of her. Her long black dyed hair and the fact that she is bi-polar only gives people more of a reason to keep away. She can knock you out with just one punch if she is in a bad mood. "Honestly, I don't know." Livy says as she's about to break. "But please don't make me talk." But just saying that was the breaking point. Tears stream down her face and she still can't breath. She puts her head on the table and covers her face with her arms and sobs unable to stop. Still bouncing her legs.
Panda wraps her arms around her. "It's ok sweetie.." she whispers "It's ok"
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