I stayed awake last night.
Not because my ceiling was on fire
but because I drank coffee after my bedtime
to spite myself and maybe
to stay up for one of your phone calls I know
won't come. My clock
is still an hour behind
and I don't know how to fix that; I guess it doesn't really matter.
I don't think you listen when I tell you
that you decide who I am and who
I will be.
Do you understand that nothing
is true and everything is permitted anymore?
I’m just another stupid girl
when starlight makes me cry and smile all at once.
I smile when the stars come coruscating
down my walls, when the excess knitting of my bedspread
becomes impossible to ignore for any longer.