i.

the first time you leaned
away from me and told me
you thought
i was beautiful (like you didn’t think it was right to
be anything but separate from me when you said it), i wondered if
eyes as pretty as yours could lie convincingly
even though everyone knows
beauty is no prerequisite to honesty (if anything, some
use it as a substitute, the way i
use smiles instead of answers); still,
when you asked me if it was okay
that you really wanted to kiss me, i felt like
an unanswered prayer, so full
of want i couldn’t stop shaking;
so light i pulled you closer
just to make sure i wouldn’t float away.

ii.

i don’t remember telling you how
to etch and
carve yourself
onto my skin in invisible ink,
or crumble yourself into a million tiny pieces
and scatter them in my bloodstream
but you must’ve learned somewhere or
it wouldn’t be this easy when
i still have no idea how
to be someone
you want.

iii.

no prophet ever warned me
to look out for nice boys who had
a way with words and
an ability to steal your breath
without ever touching your mouth
but the first time you pressed
a sunshine kiss
weighing in at zero point zero pounds
to the inside of my elbow
i thought
my lungs might’ve deflated a little
or maybe my heart just gorged itself on the sweetness of your smiles
and gained all the weight i scrape off my bones by day;
i don’t mind the extra pounds
as much as i thought i would.