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Inferno

April 16, 2013
By Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
More by this author
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 631 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.&quot;<br /> Henry David Thoreau<br /> <br /> &quot;I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once.&quot;<br /> John Green

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Run away
From the flame;
This fire
Is not tame.
Take a breath,
Beating heart,
Run before you're torn apart.

© Hali S., Robinson, IL

The author's comments:
The meaning of "fire" in this poem can be interpereted in many ways...
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 10 comments.

Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Aug. 6 2013 at 8:52 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 631 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.&quot;<br /> Henry David Thoreau<br /> <br /> &quot;I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once.&quot;<br /> John Green

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Thank you so much. It means alot :)
OldYoungOne said...
on Aug. 6 2013 at 2:35 pm
You know how I said that I couldn't feel the poem? Well not in this case. There is a deep meaning that is actually can internalize and interpret. Fire can be someone's fear or could be used to describe love itslef. The versatile meanings this poem can take on makes it wonderful poem. Well done.
LexusMarie PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 20 2013 at 2:18 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

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Hey there! I love the title! The simplicity of this poem is perfect. You were able to say everything you needed to say in seven short lines which can be difficult. The rhymes are spot on, everything flowed really well. You did a WONDERFUL job with this poem.
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD said...
on May. 11 2013 at 12:04 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;If it weren&rsquo;t for the coffee, I&rsquo;d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.&rdquo; &ndash;David Letterman

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I love the rhythm of this piece! Great job! My only suggestion is to put "is not tame" on the same line as "this fire." It would flow a little better to the ear if you did that (as it would have a similar number of syllables as "run before you're torn apart"). You don't have to take my suggestion, though, since this is a beautiful poem! Have a great day! :D
Alex_Writer GOLD said...
on May. 4 2013 at 9:33 pm
Alex_Writer GOLD, West Palm Beach, Florida
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&quot;In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.&quot; ~Eleanor Roosevelt

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Oh my gosh!!  How can such a short poem be written so it portrays so much more?  You did an excellent job at this; the fire can be interpreted into many different things.  Love it!
Mckay ELITE said...
on May. 2 2013 at 5:09 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

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Simplistic. But vivid. I could feel the seething flames radiating from your enitre poem. Well done.
NewYorkLove BRONZE said...
on Apr. 29 2013 at 7:32 pm
NewYorkLove BRONZE, Delray Beach, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Imperfection is beauty. Madness is genius. And it&#039;s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.&quot;-Marilyn Monroe<br /> &quot;A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.&quot;-Coco Chanel

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This is really well-written. The simplicity is great and yet does a fabulous job of getting the message across. A critique would be to maybe have a more descriptive second internal rhyme but the rest was amazing X.
Hanban12 ELITE said...
on Apr. 24 2013 at 6:12 pm
Hanban12 ELITE, Lake Worth, Florida
133 articles 7 photos 631 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.&quot;<br /> Henry David Thoreau<br /> <br /> &quot;I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once.&quot;<br /> John Green

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Thanks so much :)
KealliiRaycene BRONZE said...
on Apr. 24 2013 at 3:53 pm
KealliiRaycene BRONZE, Sumter, South Carolina
4 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
So what? All writers are lunatics- Cornelia Funk

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Beautiful! I love how simple it is! 
Fallen_ PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 22 2013 at 3:10 pm
Fallen_ PLATINUM, Quakertown, Pennsylvania
25 articles 3 photos 433 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot; a shattered world is only an opening into a new beginning with laughs, smiles, and love all around enter the world of the light and away from the broken darkness&quot;

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wow i love how its has a nice flow i love this part " run before your turn apart" really imergy with that :3