I bought a house for the outside
It's old
And brick
And ivy climbs up the walls
Like it holds the house together
Always reaching, reaching up for…something

I bought a house for the outside
Because across the lake of beliefs
That separates me from him
I saw a light in the upstairs window
A silhouette behind the blinds that are
Always closed,
Closed to me,
And I imagined it to be a shape that I liked

I bought a house for the outside
But I was not welcomed in
As I thought

I bought a house for the outside
Because it was beautiful
And I was naive
And I wanted it too to hold me up

I bought a house for the outside
But the foundation is unsteady
And the house is not flexible
And brick will crumble
With the slightest tremor
And I who am an earth shaker-
I will not survive.

I bought a house for the outside
But when the wind blew the shutters open
And the blinds were half mast
I did not like the soul
That stared down at me
And the wind did not catch
For the sail was full of holes
And the house-
My beautiful house
Sinks down, down

I bought a house for the outside
But I have never,
Will never
Go inside.