Deadly Words | Teen Ink

Deadly Words

December 4, 2013
By Fazzpat BRONZE, Bridgeton, New Jersey
Fazzpat BRONZE, Bridgeton, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Life is like a run on sentance,
it goes on and on,
but like all sentances it must come to an end,
the flow of words stopped like a dam of literary puncuations leaving you with a still current of unspoken words,
when life ends,
your either left with pages of memorys and accomplishments,
or a sad short story porley written,
its up to you to fill the empty lines of life,
but no one knows when the peroid will actually come.


The author's comments:
this is a poem i wrote about death, but explained in words of literation.

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This article has 2 comments.


Blynn SILVER said...
on Dec. 8 2013 at 11:25 am
Blynn SILVER, Waco, Texas
9 articles 0 photos 97 comments
First, I don't like that you compare life to a run-on sentence. Compare it to poetry or artwork, not something that is unpleasant and frowned upon.  Second, if you insist on calling it a run on sentecne, then you should consider changing later on when it says "you are either left with pages of memories and acomplishments or a sad short story poorly written" because clearly stories arent just one big run on sentence, but many individual sentences. So you are contradicting your self here. I like the last line, and I like the overall idea. If you try rewritting it, changing it a little and trying to tighten it up, I think it would be okay 

on Dec. 6 2013 at 8:38 am
FangirlTrickster SILVER, Clayton, North Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Only real risk reveals the quality of one's belief" - C.S Lewis

This is really good. I really like it. :)