We were never together.

So- why does it hurt so much?

It hurts because I like you.
I fell for you even though I was taken.
I was open to anything in the little time we had.

Me standing there next to you,
tears filling my eyes make me too nervous
to look right at you, but you pull me in anyways,
wrap your arms around me,
and whisper into my hair, “I love you.”

Don’t you know what that does to me?
I want to love you so badly,
but I can’t help but know you’re leaving.

You’re a grenade aimed at my heart
and you’ve been set to detonate
the moment you leave everything but my dreams.

And I’d like to say I’m getting over you,
but when my hearts still sobbing long after
my eyes have dried up,
I can’t even convince mind
that I don’t need you.
that I don’t love you.
that I don’t miss you.
Because the one thing that I can’t do?
Lie to myself, the world, and you.

Paint this little perfect smile across my face
because I can’t let my cracks show,
can’t let them see the real me
that’s dying to break down because of you
and beg you to come back to my arms
and be the boy I miss so much.