Glossy vanity of my own creation you have chosen now to scorn me?
Did you not come to know me well by the loathing looks I shot to your mortal enemy love’s way .
How I silently walked around the sweet kisses
How instead I grew my cactus prickles thicker, longer
But now you have placed me in front of his perfect linoleum smile and his heat travels intoxicatingly close, too close, I must scream
Scream to my teenage affliction, falling on deaf ears
For this disease, this Sisyphean struggle, none of all the great scholars nor the top doctors
With their self titled tv shows
Cannot devise a cure
You have placed me naked in the ring naked, with our common enemy
I can see the strings extending from his beautiful muscled chest pull at my rounded one and I know the ending is coming
I have been the rabbit to his fox for too long and our game of circling has lost its hold on him
But was it not you who lay this trap?
And was it not you whose bread crumbs I followed into the haunted wood?
With no trees to shelter me from the eyes of good, from the orb of his condemnation
From the shallows and shadows, they are dark
But cannot be made without the light
Hamartia hamartia hamartia
The light which falls along the sharp planes of his face forming a promised landscape
I have memorized this land, as beggars often do, with my unworthy virgin eyes
For never have I seen, never have I known such beauty that my far to mortal hands could touch.
This is what those old books warned me about me and I snobbishly relinquished to their dark places in the bookshelves, only now to cursed like Cain
They warned me about a fire, a fire that water could not put out
Because water is pure, angel’s tears and this is the devils work
And I have sinned, father I have sinned and I have come to receive to plead for my repentance
I let his breath create electrical field around my kin and tickle my heart
And even worse I’ve let your lies make corn fields in my hearts
And I have, out of nerves, plucked my bleached sterile white wings
This is the desire that you warned me about
But in his eyes I see no labyrinth from which I can escape
But as they say love is blind
And only w***es kiss with their eyes open
But he is my original sin
He is the cause for my excommunication
But I am thirsty from all these empty prayers, so I dare to take a sip of the blessed wine
In peace it is sweet but now it will burn when it goes too deep into my corrupted arteries
He is my quicksand sin and I have struggled to long to taste his apple and now I never will
For I have been destined to fall