Unseen Essence | Teen Ink

Unseen Essence

March 24, 2014
By JarodM GOLD, Paducah, Kentucky
JarodM GOLD, Paducah, Kentucky
14 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Quiet and light;
that's what I am.
The gaps 'tween
you and others
Between grounds
and never-end Space.
Filament for caverns,
of earth or closer
Held in panic
Held in surprise
but always let out
Don't lose your will
I won't allow it, if
no reason to live;
then let me be your reason;
your pressure.
A pressure, constant,
pushing in 'n out.
All around, enveloped in you,
is where I am found.
Found, funny for
I am unseen, unnoticed.
Unseen by your eyes,
'n eyes of all
All you see,
I see ever-more.
More light n dark;
virtue and villainous.
I give you life,
through a sacred bond.
Bound to another,
another of importance.
Important to life is,
my bond-mate.
A quench of sustenance
Sustain, I even more.
I fill you with, vigor.
Do you know of what I am?
I am your breath;
Your drink, your
Life.


The author's comments:
Just one morning, looked out a window and wrote. I wanted a new look on what is taken for granted more than any other material, life itself. Of course, I put it in more real standards using water and oxygen as my meanings toward life itself.

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This article has 5 comments.


JarodM GOLD said...
on Oct. 15 2014 at 8:35 am
JarodM GOLD, Paducah, Kentucky
14 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Yeah.  When I read it sounds like the scene in a movie where someone is discovering something through a writing so they speed up. haha  It was how it was when I was writing it.  When I write poetry I don't really go back and revise it, but for the next one I will keep that in mind

on Apr. 10 2014 at 11:03 am
JacobTheOrdinary PLATINUM, Rancho Cucamonga, California
43 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Fiction is the lie that tells the truth."

It seems to be going too fast. I would suggest a better use of puntuation and spacing. Keep at it.

JarodM GOLD said...
on Apr. 2 2014 at 1:16 pm
JarodM GOLD, Paducah, Kentucky
14 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Thank you so much for kind words.  This was the first poem I did with this style of writing.  I am glad it is being well recieved. :D

on Apr. 1 2014 at 2:42 pm
WinterRose76 SILVER, Ok., Florida
6 articles 6 photos 183 comments

Favorite Quote:
Arise and be all that you dream - Flyleaf

This is such a beautiful poem! I love your writing style - it's so unique and captivating. 5/5 stars

JarodM GOLD said...
on Mar. 31 2014 at 9:07 am
JarodM GOLD, Paducah, Kentucky
14 articles 0 photos 8 comments
Would love to here feedback on this if any.  All viable feedback is good feedback to me!