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Despise
My brother cried himself to sleep today.
My boyfriend just told me he was molested.
And my friend just told me she tried to kill herself last night.
Sometimes I wish it was me.
I wish I was the one who had to go through that. Just to take the pain away from them. It kills me to know... that they aren't happy.
Sometimes I hate this world...
How this world made my life almost perfect. Sometimes I hate myself. As I catch myself thinking about how I don't want to clean my room, I feel like I deserve a knife in my back. I am guilty... if I could I would trade places with the one who's suffering just to save them. A friend, a sibling, or even a stranger. Just for a moment... I pretend i'm just as messed up as you are, but then I realize I kind of am. Heck this world is just so cruel, not one person in it can be perfect. This society makes me sick, no wonder so many people want to die. So next time you call that person who attempted suicide selfish, look around you. Do you really think it was their fault for hating life? I despise myself for not being able to take away their pain. I despise myself for being happy. And I despise you for hating yourself.
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