Thoughts rumble in my head like a stampede
Trampling me deeper and deeper into an abyss full of confusion and hate.
Suffocating on sadness
Beaten down by anger
Everywhere I look there's a wall;
Another impossible obstacle blocking my way of survival
How am I suppose to stay strong when every bone in my body is screaming at me telling me to give up?
The bad memories and emotions overwhelm me
Dark thoughts cloud my weak mind
My vision blurs as water pours from my eyes
I want to let go
To release the sadness and hate
To let go of the stress ripping me apart
Right before I say goodbye to the yelling and screaming
Before I end the heartbreak and fear.
I see it
The rainy day
The dark clothes covering the broken bodies soaked with tears
The casket surrounded by flowers
Speech after speech full of anger, sadness, and regret
A black void grows in the hearts of the ones dressed in black feeding off of their grief.
Depression sets in to the mom wandering where her baby is
The dad's eyes once filled with love are now vacant
Siblings in need of parents love, slowly drift into a depression numbed by needles and drugs
Friends slowly drift apart because their anchor has vanished.
Lives impaired
Hearts broken
All from one unforgiving decision
A selfish thought
Leading to an easy way out
Making the ones I love hurt like I did
Causing a never ending chain of heartache.
No!
It's not worth it
I can't let go
This is not the answer
It won't bring me peace
I would have murdered more lives then my own
I can't do it
Slowly I back away from the ledge
Never giving into those evil thoughts again
Finally the stampede slows to a calming rumble
And I find peace.