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Amnesia
Lonesome.
Is this what adulthood
is supposed to feel like?
It's like I've got amnesia
because I'll have forgotten you
and then suddenly flash back to you,
staining the blank slate
I'd finally gotten clean
because I'll remember:
I miss you.
I'll recall bit by bit how
you were constantly by my side,
steadying me,
guiding me,
catching me.
Then I'll look over and see
an empty spot instead,
the absence refusing to be filled
despite my constant glances
and desperate wishing.
When I remember it all,
tears bleed out of my eyes,
blinding me so that
I fall
and hit my head.
I'll wake up,
alone.
Where am I?
And why do I ache?
Lonesome.
Is this what adulthood
is supposed to feel like?
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I tried to make the poem mimic how people get amnesia in the fist place. At the end, the narrator "falls and hits her head", metaphorically meaning she's tripped over memories of her past lover. After being struck by pain, she forgets everything. All she knows is that something hurts, and that she's alone. Then the cycle starts all over again.