Shimmers in the Night | Teen Ink

Shimmers in the Night

March 12, 2015
By Yoela PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
Yoela PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
27 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My powers stretch over the horizon and work even when my eyes are closed"


you

left me alone

when you

vanished

 

i am

seeking

the shadows

you cast aside

in your wake

 

they are heavy

with waves and

angry with frothy foam

and drifting

without you

 

one ghost

to the next

i search

for clues

 

but all 

you

left behind

were hearts

 

once whole

now shattered

into the sparkling 

glass

that shimmers

under the night



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This article has 4 comments.


Yoela PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 28 2015 at 10:42 pm
Yoela PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
27 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My powers stretch over the horizon and work even when my eyes are closed"

Thanks for the comment! I was actually going for the empty and haunting tone. It is missing something, by design :P It is a reflection of how I felt.

on Apr. 28 2015 at 9:43 am
LotusChild PLATINUM, Raleigh, North Carolina
32 articles 0 photos 62 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let them hate, so long as they fear me" ~Colligula

I like it, but (no offense) I feel it lacks something... Some sustenance, understand? But perhaps that's just me. Still, there's a haunting chill I feel when I read it, so perhaps that's what you were going for? All in all, great work ^-^

Yoela PLATINUM said...
on Mar. 16 2015 at 3:30 pm
Yoela PLATINUM, Seattle, Washington
27 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My powers stretch over the horizon and work even when my eyes are closed"

Thank you so much!! I really appreciate your comment!! I wonder what you would think of a different poem I wrote called "A Weight Off My Shoulders." Thanks Again!!

on Mar. 16 2015 at 2:31 pm
Allen. PLATINUM, Palo Alto, California
32 articles 9 photos 525 comments

Favorite Quote:
[i]No matter how much people try to put you down or make you think other things about yourself, the only person you can trust about who you really are is you[/i] -Crusher-P

Good job writing this. I can really feel the emotion in your word choice. There's really nothing here to improve. You've done a very good job.