Hum Of Night | Teen Ink

Hum Of Night

May 17, 2015
By GraceM. BRONZE, West Bountiful, Utah
GraceM. BRONZE, West Bountiful, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.&rdquo; <br /> ― Ralph Waldo Emerson


The orange light creeps over the city,
shadowing the sun with a beautiful beam

 

and city lights come out,
telling the world its time for bed

 

and the children head to rest,
with monsters under their beds and sugarplums dancing in their heads

 

but the teenagers with weary eyes and scattered thoughts must stay awake to finish the work from the day

 

and the restless mothers that lie awake with a worried whisper and a cup of tea, hum alongside the midnight sky

 

and the bright shining moon finally comes out to play, bringing along a train of stars to light the way.


The author's comments:

A poem ive been working on for a while now. I really enjoyed writing this! Hope you enjoy it too :)


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This article has 12 comments.


on Jun. 17 2015 at 10:05 pm
alaina_h BRONZE, Wilmington, Delaware
4 articles 3 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. -Audrey Hepburn

I really like the feeling you created...sort of sleepy and whimsical. I would still work on the cadence and rythm however...count the syllables in each line and try to create some sort of pattern where there's a correlation. I would love it if you could take a look at one of my poems and give me some feedback...

on Jun. 6 2015 at 10:28 am
Consalvator BRONZE, South Jordan, Utah
1 article 0 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.&quot; - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Great story! I love when poems portray events. Only improvement would be flow, it was just a tad choppy. Good imagery!

on Jun. 1 2015 at 10:54 am
Bleach10101 BRONZE, Hillsborough, North Carolina
1 article 0 photos 1 comment
good work I liked it

on May. 31 2015 at 2:42 pm
Luv4Ever SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
A miracle is just another name for hard work<br /> -Minho in &quot;To The Beautiful You&quot;

this does have great imagery but i do feel you could improve on the flow and rhythm of poem. good job ^^

on May. 29 2015 at 9:22 am
super.ballerina SILVER, League City, Texas
5 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Emotion is the greatest source of writing.&quot;

Really nice work. I could picture everything that you were saying. Great use of wording.

on May. 28 2015 at 2:25 am
Jewelz2015 BRONZE, Cudahy, California
1 article 11 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
School is preparation for life. -Christopher Howard

i liked it.. i only write my thoughts down when I'm really mad or sad

GraceM. BRONZE said...
on May. 26 2015 at 2:49 pm
GraceM. BRONZE, West Bountiful, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.&rdquo; <br /> ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thank you! Means a lot :)))

GraceM. BRONZE said...
on May. 26 2015 at 2:49 pm
GraceM. BRONZE, West Bountiful, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.&rdquo; <br /> ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thank you :))

GraceM. BRONZE said...
on May. 26 2015 at 2:48 pm
GraceM. BRONZE, West Bountiful, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.&rdquo; <br /> ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thank you!!

Catness BRONZE said...
on May. 26 2015 at 12:11 pm
Catness BRONZE, Franklin, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you-Dr. Seuss

I really like the imagery in this! Great job!

on May. 26 2015 at 1:51 am
pikachulover SILVER, Kanpur, Other
6 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
Remember, today is the tomorrow of yesterday you worried about.

Well penned, a flow of imagination enhanced your poem!

on May. 26 2015 at 1:50 am
Katyaini SILVER, Greater Noida, Other
9 articles 0 photos 85 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is like a chocolate covered chilly.... <br /> <br /> Some succeed because they&#039;re destined to; <br /> Most succeed because they&#039;re determined too

Beautiful imagery.... loved it.