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Twisted Whispers
Late last night I toyed with the ideas of secrets
Some are seemingly innocent
Like when I told you about the guy I like
Some are meant to be held true and dear
My brother was the first one to to find me laughing on the phone with my boyfriend and lovingly teased me fore hours
Some bring joy
Dont you dare tell my mom but I got my first kiss
Some are more painful
You need to hear this from my but the wreck was caused by them drinking
Some are insanely serious
I took your i.d. and got pulled over... They are pressing charges
Some are more meaningful
I fell in love with you from the way your eyes shine to the way you make invisble art with words
Some are meant to hurt others
You are the reason I took those pills
Some are meant to build and restore relationships
Did he at least tell you I said no?
Some are surely meant to destroy them
I was only with him to get back at you
But either way the dice roll
You give away black mail to others
At first it is child's play
The basic he said she said game
Then the secret is twisted and rewritten through seemingly loud whispers in a dark hallway
Finally when the cards are fully dealt
The secrets you started with are branded into your skin in an ink you cant seem to find
But to everyone else the words might as well glow
Though in that ink two stories are left to be read
First your own words which have molded themselves to your shattered heart
And the verison whose words destroy and forever only burn
And thoise friends who started in the beginning of this black hole as your very own army
Before you even realizr what you are doing your hand is in the air holding and waving a flag
That should be surrender enough... right?
No instead that flag is tattered and covered with the words you never said
Every secret after your trust is broken had better be held close to your heart guarded close by your shattered battered ribs tht have been broken down by the lies and sewn together with your blue viens that strain and and twist to the point nothing not even the silent screams that you form in your throat could ever pierce through it
Not after you were forced to your knees and abandoned by the people you once called your best friends
After every light of joy was stripped
After the bruises of betrayal had faded you realized the fact of life is that you denied existed is that no one will ever be trust worthy enough to cause the secret you buried six feet uynder never to be seen again
But wait even as the knowledge of what could no would happen resurfaced you met that person who caused the blue thread to strain as though to constrict the flutter of crippling hope from even forming
But even the past cant stop the way you give out trust as though it will make the scars less visble or make them disappear
But as I wake to begin another day
The sickening question secrets plague me but only one aspect keeps my mouth sealed shut sso that not even the sweetest words from the purest lips could open it
Which leaves me to question myself as I see and hear every beautiful thing that draws me into the trap of safety
Like the game of predator and prey or the hunter and the hunted
The hunted never realizes the danger they are in until they have no escape
Until the day turns to night
Until the pain of the gunshots have become dull to feeling
Which begs to question
Will my secrets stay?
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I wrote this piece because of what was happening at school.. An ex of mine was saying things about me and slandering who I was. This is how I was hurting when it was happening and I got to thinking maybe every secret was something that could be twisted and I realized that was the truth even the smallest things.