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Anxious Child
It is sunny and they are all outside.
Stay inside stay inside. Stay inside
and close the blinds so they don’t see your eyes.
Watch the world behind a lense of broken glass
you broke too long ago to fix.
A call.
Pick up the phone, No! Don’t pick up the phone.
Pick up the phone and have the words between your teeth
but not able to spill over your lips.
A party, tonight.
The red dress is too bright I like the black one
it sways when I walk. Fiddle with hems of stitching
until wrapping strands from stitching around numb fingers.
It is dark and I see clouds instead of sharp lines,
fumble.
He is touching me and he is beer and sex and thrill
and my fingers are still numb.
Push him away. He is not moving
and push him harder because
he is now more beer than man.
Close the door,
the world is ugly
and child you are not.
Tremble in your rattling cage
and pray for a new day.
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I think people often don't understand what goes on in the mind of someone with anxiety, and I wanted to accurately dipict that.