10 times he held me.
this was comfort.
this was pure content, free of the worries of each day.

9 compliments whispered in my ears.
this was believable.
this was how to feel good, released from the judgement of peers.

8 promises made to me.
this was trust.
this was putting your faith in someone, letting them hold your heart.

7 times he came through with our plans.
this was new.
this was someone being there, being reliable and giving me hope.

6 times he held my hand.
this was safe.
this was being grounded, nothing could pull me away while he pulled me to him.

5 times he told me ‘later.’
this was different.
this was questioning him, just maybe that trust shouldn't have been put in him.

4 times he cancelled on me.
this was uncomfortable.
this was regretting, he is just like everyone else.

3 times he didn't even look at me when i walked in.
this was hurtful.
this was taking it back, trying to keep him from crushing me completely.

2 times he pointed out the flaws that everyone else did too.
this was cruel.
this was too late, this was him stomping on everything he had built up.

1 time i ceased to exist to him.
this was agonizing.
this was heartbreaking, him deciding he was ready to leave while i am still chained to the floor.