A Prison Of My Own Device | Teen Ink

A Prison Of My Own Device

November 23, 2020
By Anonymous

Forgive and Forget they always say, 

But I’ve never felt it that way. 

When it comes to forgiving someone else’s wrongs,

 Though spiteful, my anger it never lasts long. 


Now  forgetting well that seemed a simpler thing,

Then reality hits and I still feel the sting. 

I forgive easily, maybe too much so, 

But forgetting one’s own mistakes is hard to let go.

 

Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device . . .

 

And the chill of the chamber, 

breathes cold down my spine. 

The feelings once sleeping, 

awaken inside.


And the hauntings of demons

That dwell in my past.

Come back for seconds, 

That I did not have.


Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device . . .

 

The thoughts in my head

Are nothing to fear,

Cuz the ghosts of my past 

Are ones that I put here .


And My greatest fear?

Amounting to nothing,

Now spit in my face

While I’m stuck in this dungeon.

 

Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device . . .

 

The Pain of my past.

The sum of mistakes.

The pit in my heart,

It widens each day.


Stitched back together 

With needle and thread.

A painful reminder 

Of wounds without end. 

 

Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device . . .


Guilt for forgetting

And suffering if not.

The Empty inside,

An Abandoned lot


The faces of friends

And worlds left behind. 

The bridges I burned 

Didn’t cost me a dime. 

 

Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device . . .

 

Breaking the bars.

Freed from the cage.

Maybe I’ll live

For just one more day.


The thoughts in my head

They won’t go away,

But I could survive 

If I hold them at bay.


Memories fade slow like the melting of ice

When I’m in a prison of my own device.


The author's comments:

It's hard to forgive others, But it's harder to forgive yourself. And when your in a place like that or in that state of mind, it can feel like your trapped; Trapped in A Prison of your own device, and no one can torture you better . . .

Than yourself.


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