A general rule about book-turned-movies is that the movies are almost always terrible. The acting is almost always virtually nonexistent, and story lines tend to somehow disappear. Of course, there are exceptions to this rule. Sometimes, despite this rule, people get their hopes up. Unluckily for Twilight fans, the movie was just as bad as your average book-turned-movie, which is to say, atrocious.

Despite having a fairly decent cast, the whole concept of acting seems to have completely flown out the window. Lines are mostly monotonous and delivered without expression, aside from the occasional burst of anger sparking shouted lines. The fear that the main characters are supposed to be feeling must have been treated with anti-anxiety meds or whatever it is that doctors are prescribing, because the actors look just about as bored as the average student listening to the drone of an advanced physics lecture.

Many essential parts of the story itself have also been entirely omitted. Love, the holy grail of the Twilight saga, and one of the only reasons so many of these books have been sold, is pretty much absent in the movie. On screen, Bella and Edward look like they’re being burnt at stake for all the love they seem to be showing. This deep emotion they are supposed to feel for each other is made up of bad jokes, moodiness and unexplained dialogue that only who has actually bothered to read the book would understand. It’s rather like watching a film in a foreign language and only comprehending half of what’s going on.

Even so, Twilight had the biggest opening ever for a film directed by a woman and starring a woman. It is also still a movie that won a number of awards, although mostly Teen Choice Awards. Maybe it’s just that strong pull of this mysterious, mystical world that your stereotypical teenage girl dreams of. Maybe it’s the idea of monsters, even though these vampires only take down mountain lions and bears. Or perhaps it’s just that even if the movie does not live up to expectations, it’s still quite entertaining to poke fun at. In any case, New Moon was received well, and Eclipse can look forward to millions too. I know I’ll be heading to the theatres when Eclipse comes out, because really, laughing is the best medicine, and where better start than a Twilight movie?