Opulence | Teen Ink

Opulence MAG

May 1, 2008
By AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
5 articles 0 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There&#039;s just too much fraternizing with the enemy. ~Henry Kissinger<br /> <br /> Life it too short to let you matter.


I’ve been watching him for days now. When he leaves his house to go to school, I’m the one carefully tailing him, switching cars every day to make myself look less suspicious. If he ever sneaks out of his second-story room, I’ll be the one silently watching from a nearby tree. In class when he turns, feeling eyes on the back of his head, I’m the one who sent the hair on the back of his neck up on end. I am the girl whose shadow is always slightly overlapping his.

Being assigned to watch him almost makes me
feel like I’m not a stalker. Though I’m only 17, I’m a full-fledged member of the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. I’ve been with them since the ­tender age of five. It’s my home. Being an orphan, my office is also my permanent residence, the couch a fold-out bed. There are many others like me: no family. A lot of us are loners and haven’t chosen this route for ourselves.

I’m a tracker. I have been for years and some might say that I am the best at not being the best. In other words, I’m great at being invisible. Or at not being noticed. It’s not as hard as the others in the organization think. Being young and female is good, since most we track are young. Seeing me around younger people – my age, actually – doesn’t raise alarm bells. It helps that I’m cute. With a small frame, light hazel eyes, and short blond hair that curls under my chin, I don’t appear threatening. Of course, my ­organization-funded training doesn’t back that theory.

Soon I won’t be tracking down others with the power. They are finally going to give me an apprentice. After years of mastering everything I’ve been taught, they see my potential. That’s not to say I know everything. Even with my extended life I won’t be able to learn all the things I want to. If only this annoying boy would show the signs. It’s been almost a week. If he doesn’t show soon, they’ll reassign me. That much longer until I get my apprentice.

So here I am, sipping a latté and waiting for the Target to leave for school. I have been put in all of his classes in case something happens there, though I graduated high school years ago. Private tutors sped things up. With no family or personal ties, I had lots of time to devote to my studies. Martial arts black belts. Twelve languages, not including English. Everything a girl needs for a serious career in the agency. Such positions of power are not handed out easily. You must prove yourself many times over.

The Target and I have never spoken, but I know a lot about him. His file told me some, but after watching him for only a few days, I feel confident in saying that I know things no one else does. Not just the obvious, either. He resents his father and is protective of his mother, which makes me suspect the father is less than faithful. He smiles often but doesn’t make a lot of eye contact. He usually only speaks when spoken to. Although he has many friends, he isn’t close with any of them. The Target is observant, a watcher. This leads me to believe we would get along if he shows any promise.

I look down at my watch, then back at his house a few blocks away. The Target is late, which means I’ll be late too. Today my ride is a shiny black sports car, not out of place in this suburb full of midlife-crisis men. I turn on the engine impatiently. I’m fiddling with the radio when I hear something. I don’t feel any immediate danger, and I know to trust those feelings. But I ­also know that something is off.

Just as I am about to get out of the car and pretend to look in the trunk, the passenger door opens. I look up in surprise as the Target slides into the seat next to me. I grin, quite pleased by this turn of events. This is definitely a good sign. Perhaps intuition is strong in him. That would be good for my apprentice to have, complementary. I could handle having to deal with that.

“Hello, Lenna. Why have you been following me for a week now?” the Target asks lightly, conversationally, his first words ever said in my direction.

Ah, one of my many aliases. The organization set it up so that whenever I’m on a case, I get a new name, past, and present. It’s very powerful. The organization can basically do anything it needs; it has people everywhere imaginable. I’m just one of many, though there aren’t that many at the top, as I am. They don’t trust many to be trackers. Or to be apprentices. All of the full members have the power, though we control others to get things done.

My smile deepens as I say in my authoritative, professional voice, “My real name is Jade. I am a witch of the moon and a tracker for the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. You are also a witch. We would like to formally welcome you into the organization as my apprentice. Here is my card for verification.”

Jade Wordsworth
Tracker for O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E
Official Political Understanding Lending ­Everyone ­Navigation for Co-Existing Ethereals
Office hours: 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon-Sat
Phone: 555-5555
Proud league of witches of the sun and moon.
Worldwide.

“What do you mean ‘moon and sun’? Or ‘tracker’?” he asks, still looking at my card like it’s going to ­disappear.

“Types of magic. Moon is all about spells, the sun is more potion-based, though each type of witchcraft involves the other somehow. As a tracker, I find people like you and I bring them to O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. Every witch must register, train, and become a member by law. In fact, the organization is like a government targeted toward witches,” I explain with a smile, loving the fact that this time I get to teach the newbie.

“Magic? Seriously?” he asks, eyes wide, meeting mine. They are large, yellow, and catlike.

I click a button on my left, automatically locking the doors. I put the car into drive, pulling out onto the road. As an afterthought I add as a courtesy, “I think you had better come with me.” .



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This article has 896 comments.


on Apr. 30 2010 at 11:21 am
.A.Silence.in.Winter. BRONZE, Truckee, California
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Those who plants in tears will harvest with shouts of joy.&quot; - Psalms 126:5

What a concept!  I too was suspecting some sort of government organization, so it surprised me when you brought out the witch card!  A lot of others don't seem to like it, but I do because it means you SURPRISED US!  =D  That's always a great tool in a writer's toolkit.

I would like to know why the boy just hopped in the car with her... Since "the hair on the back of his neck" was standing up when he saw her, it didn't seem to me like his character was ready to hop into a car with this stranger.

But I did enjoy Lenna's character very much!  ^^  The ending made me laugh and was a perfect little bow to tie off this cute piece.  I think you could definitely expand upon this!


on Apr. 29 2010 at 12:31 am
Prosaic-Scriptor BRONZE, Davis, California
4 articles 0 photos 24 comments
Hmmm. I'll start off by saying that you do have talent. It's slightly buried underneath the sludge of random, pedantic text you seem to be tossing at us. It moves way too fast, into too much detail. Short prose must be choosy. I didn't really take away any message from this. But you do have talent, I would suggest working on it!

on Apr. 28 2010 at 7:16 pm
elle_la_vie BRONZE, Cresskill, New Jersey
1 article 11 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
the man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. :)

i don't really like the witches too, it would hav been alot better if it was spys

on Apr. 27 2010 at 11:26 am
.iloveyou. GOLD, Evansville, Wyoming
14 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;There are but two certainties in life; death and taxes.&quot; Ben Franklin

This is a great begining but i must agree that the ending has much to be desired. I loved it until it got to the witches part then it moved a little too fast. A lot of infromation was cramped into like a couple of lines. Other than those few things, that was absolutley amazing.

on Apr. 26 2010 at 8:59 am
PrincessSparkle GOLD, Flint, Michigan
11 articles 0 photos 53 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever said Nothings impossible clearly never tried to slam a rotating door.

Im with you. Witches? Really? I mean, I loved the tracker part. It made me think the government has some spys and what not and the kid was like a bomber. But witches? You lost me there. I hate it.

on Apr. 25 2010 at 7:43 pm

This is annoying.

 

Keep writing, I'm sure you'll make a ton of money with some soulless, boring, predictable, ripoff book.

 

But I like the use of the word "ethereals". That, at least, is interesting.


on Apr. 25 2010 at 7:03 pm
amethyst990 BRONZE, Wexford, Pennsylvania
3 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be who you are, and say what you feel, because those who mind, don&#039;t matter and those who matter don&#039;t mind.<br /> ~Dr. Suess

Pretty interesting, i liked the way it ended, but the witches thing was a bit far-fetched.

robbi BRONZE said...
on Apr. 25 2010 at 6:39 pm
robbi BRONZE, Goldsboro, North Carolina
2 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
quotes are for people who are too uncreative to come up with their own sources of information.----ME.

that was very interesting and so very well written! please write more about this.

Lorelei SILVER said...
on Apr. 25 2010 at 3:12 pm
Lorelei SILVER, Newport News, Virginia
9 articles 0 photos 56 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Nothing is ever easy&quot;- Zeddicus Zul Zorander, copied by Richard Rahl

Okay, my short story that is out is called Bizarro. I am also writing a book with the tentative tilte, "My Dog Sam"

on Apr. 25 2010 at 12:51 am
GymClassHero BRONZE, Canberra, Other
3 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
A half-done defiance will lead to unbeatable rebellion.

Really great story :D

Just a heads up though, I think the story moved a little fast. But the description was really, really good.

Can you please take a look at mine and comment?

It's called Gothic Tales, I would appreciate some constructive criticism :P


on Apr. 24 2010 at 11:33 pm
AlexandraVasari PLATINUM, Fort Stewart, Georgia
28 articles 4 photos 174 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Writing songs is super intimate. It&#039;s a bit like getting naked&quot;~ Gwen Stefani

I agree about the ending, I love Harry Potter but idk. It reminds me of the begining of the Matrix a little bit. I think you could stretch your idea out a lot farther and add more to it. Right now it seems kind of rushed and honestly I don't like the end very much. Other than that it's a cool idea and you were pretty discriptive.:)

on Apr. 24 2010 at 9:07 pm
goober-reader BRONZE, Visalia, California
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments
I loved it and wish there was more

on Apr. 24 2010 at 7:03 pm
Alice_in_Wonderland GOLD, San Clemente, California
16 articles 0 photos 620 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;I could give up, I could stay stuck, or I could move on, So I put one foot front of the other, No no no nothing&rsquo;s gonna break my stride, &ldquo; &ndash;David Archuleta (The Other Side of Down)

interesting story...I didn't like that it ended up to be about witches... well written though.

Sarbear GOLD said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 6:58 pm
Sarbear GOLD, Milan, Ohio
10 articles 4 photos 489 comments

Favorite Quote:
--Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you&#039;re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.<br /> --When life gives you lemons, squirt them in people&#039;s eyes.

very nice. wish i could read more!

Lonleydandy said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 4:04 pm
I liked it, but it was kind of akward to end the story like that.......it was pretty good though.....

AudreyC BRONZE said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 8:22 am
AudreyC BRONZE, Nope :), North Carolina
3 articles 0 photos 1 comment
great story, but it kinda ruined it for me when it ended up being about a witch....i found that a strange way to end the story. 

JacobC GOLD said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 6:55 am
JacobC GOLD, Belgium, Wisconsin
10 articles 4 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Am I indecisive? Well, yes and no.&quot; -Anonymous

I can definately see why this is the most popular story on Teenink.

on Apr. 24 2010 at 4:29 am
GymClassHero BRONZE, Canberra, Other
3 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
A half-done defiance will lead to unbeatable rebellion.

I thought it was pretty good :D

I just think that the story moved too fast.....people keep saying that to my stories.

Can you read mine?

TeenInk.com/fiction/all/article/197489/Gothic-Tales/


on Apr. 24 2010 at 12:39 am
Sir-William BRONZE, 111111, Wisconsin
3 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;A certain degree of neurosis is of inestimable value as a drive, especially to a psychologist.&quot; - Sigmund Freud

Very interesting idea, however I felt that you told me too much. Maybe if you added a few scenes where we see his relationship wiht his father, and not just telling us. I think that would make it even better! But very interesting idea.

on Apr. 22 2010 at 9:13 am
Denali.B. BRONZE, Calgary, Other
2 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is knowing that you don&#039;t put it in a fruit salad.&quot; - Unknown Source

Oh i loved it, i really like how you write and how it turned around where the Target was watching her too